Our internet has been pretty bad for about 4 months. It is too slow for skype and my patience is too short to wait to upload photos for a blog post. I love photos, without them, how do you tell a story?! Anyway, today the internet isn't that bad, so I'm going to upload as many as I can.
In September, we found out that we were pregnant... bahaha! After Eden we tried for 2.5 years. Then we thought that since God hadn't given us another, maybe He just wanted us to have 3. We were VERY grateful for our 3 and decided not to even think about it anymore and just celebrate and enjoy our family of 5. I know they tell people who have dealt with/dealing with infertility that all they have to do is relax and stop stressing and then they'll get pregnant. That's a bunch of hooey and could be pretty hurtful if they are in the middle of it. In this instance, I think God must have a specific plan for this 4th little one, and that plan starts in 2016. Who would have thought that after all our journeys, we would get to experience a surprise baby. Seriously, are we now people who make babies "on accident"?! I never understood how that could happen.
I remember one of my friends telling me that once you are 35+ and pregnant they call it "advanced maternal age". Yeah, it feels like it! I'm kind of embarrassed to describe how hard this has been for me, I sound pretty lame. I had horrible all day long morning sickness with my other pregnancies, but this is the first time drugs were needed. I take them every night or else I wouldn't be able to eat and I would get dehydrated. Besides stomach cramps, I can smell everything and it all makes me gag. The worst is probably the calcium in our water. I have started using plastic cups and bottled water because I can't get the smell off our dishes. (Can you imagine having to live with me, poor Jimmy!) Our shower makes me gag, but there is no way around it. Sweaty little boy hair... wow! My kids are going to have a complex. And my gift from Petén, something crawled behind my oven and died. Sometimes big dead lizards can stink, but I've already given it a week, so it's something larger... who wants to go find it? My oven is a wall oven mounted in concrete, so it is going to be an ordeal to get it out.
Jimmy has been the biggest sweetheart. He is working non-stop at the farm, teaching, welding, finishing up construction projects, and fixing different problems. For about 2 months he fed us too. The staples that I could eat were homemade carrot soup,
homemade cornbread croutons (minus the chicken, but with lots of avocado),
tons of baked sweet potatoes, and taco salad. Jimmy made sure the baby got lots of healthy stuff. He is such a good husband and daddy! These past 2 months have been really hard on us. I'm not complaining, I'm acknowledging how much my family has been through to help me. I felt like a worthless burden. The worst is over now, the stomach cramps are better. I'm in my 14th week and really praying that by week 16 the nausea will be completely gone too!
I had 2 sweet missionary friends make us some yummy food and bring it over. We had meatballs, sugar cookies, and then cinnamon buns for days! SO good!
Another beautiful friend brought chicken and dumplings with apple pie. Those are Silas' favorite foods! He might go live with her.
I think another reason I have really struggled with this pregnancy is that our first appointment was in Petén and it was a train wreck. I was spotting and worried. I kept saying, "I see the baby's heart beat" and the doctor said probably 4 times, "well, that's the good news" and then just had this silent smirk on his face. That made me so frustrated. Are you a sicko... don't stand silent for 5 minutes when an emotional pregnant lady is in your office! I could see the pockets of blood in my uterus too, which I've had before, but he finally explained it like it could be the placenta detaching itself and starting to miscarry. That upset me even though I didn't believe him. He wanted to give me an injection of progesterone, without checking my levels and then immediately start me on tablets and then have me stop 2 weeks later. WELL, I'm not a doctor, but after the mountain of doctors we have seen over the years, I'm pretty sure that drop in progesterone would have insured a miscarriage. My good doctor is 7 hours away. I just wanted to see him!!!!
Another thing that was difficult for me is that while this was happening I couldn't share it with anyone in our ministry. In Kekchi culture, it is vulgar to talk about being pregnant. I wanted to know people were praying for our baby, but not a mention was made. Sometimes I would miss important things like birthdays or services because I was sick. I couldn't explain why, it's rude. Jonah told one of the parents of the students who was visiting the farm that I wasn't there that day because there was a baby in my belly. The parent was horrified and couldn't believe that we speak of such things with our children. All cultures are different, but that is one difference that I really struggle with. Finally, last Wednesday one of the Spanish girls that come to our youth group patted my belly and said, "You have a bump! How many months are you?!" That made me so happy! I had a little moment of sharing my pregnancy and someone to celebrate with.
Traveling to the capital takes up time we don't have, it's expensive, and there have been lots of protests blocking the roads anyway. Thankfully about a month after our first appointment we decided to try a new doctor here in Petén. He looks about 18. I'm assuming he was a child prodigy.
No, he was really nice and so much more knowledgeable. His office in located in the middle of the "red light district". Jimmy always wants to be with me when I get news about the baby, so we all loaded up and went. We get out of the car and literally had to step over this drunk man laying cross-ways on the sidewalk. At that point I was still trying to be optimistic. But then a couple minutes later I got to see my baby! I cried!
Everything looked perfect! No more pockets of blood. The baby waved their arm and then did this cute little bounce. (I think we might have another little Jonah personality in there!) The doctor gave us an excellent report and the due date of May 15th.
This next Monday we got an appointment with my OB in Guate who will deliver this baby. We found a baby sitter for our kids and Jimmy and I are flying up and back in one day. I cannot wait! I hope we will get to find out the sex, he has 4D on his machine. Eden really wants a baby sister and of course the boys want another brother. I am thrilled whatever they are!
God, the Author of life, has given our family this wonderful blessing! If my kids had been any younger, they wouldn't be sharing this experience with us. Each night they pray that God will protect our baby and help it grow! Eden keeps asking me when the baby is gonna come out. "It taken SO long, Mama!" I am making her a little baby wrap for Christmas because I know she will be right next to me all the time with her baby doll strapped to her like mommy! This is one lucky baby to have 3 siblings that are so excited about loving on them. Silas told me today, "Mama, I'm really happy God put a baby in your tummy. I will love it forever and ever."
CRAZY ITEM OF THE DAY: We were all discussing names the other day. Jonah really wants us to name the baby Honey. We told him that we probably wouldn't pick that name. He said that he didn't care, that would be what he calls the baby!